aunt agony!

dear all! now is time for  the act-pro love advisor to explain some thwarted thesis. today’s i am gonna investigate on the validity of the statement : is there a time-resolved definition of an ideal girlfren/boyfren.

I appears to me that ppl’s definition of a girlfren and/or a boyfrend changes with time. yes. and it is pretty scary how drastic that change may be. what is meant by time-resolved definition of ideal gf/bf?

that means if u ask ah beng ‘hey bengs, wad’s the definition of a girlfren??’

ah beng, being in his teens, may say ‘’someone who can make u feel butterflies in ur stomach. when u see her, ur heart thumps faster and faster and u feel very excited. u cant take ur eyes off her. when she’s off sight, u think of her every moment, and u feel so blessed when u are with her. and,she’s most likely a girl with big eyes, hot & slim bod, frank personality, shows positivity and is confident.

then, u nod ur head and say ‘wow, that;s love, that’s the definition of a girlfren.

so time passed, and when u meet up with ah beng probably 2 yrs down the road, u ask him the same old donkey grandma question. whats the definition of an ideal girlfren?

probably he would reply ‘’someone who’s bold, dare to pursue her dreams, independent, and lives her life with lots of hope. someone my parents would be happy to see. someone who has good EQ, and has great personality. probably, someone who is able to talk non-stop and make u happy. someone who is sticky, and able to give me my freedom at the same time

and once again, u nodded ur head, and said well well, i seee..

but time passed, and down the road, ah beng repeated the cycle of being together with some1, breaking up with some1, and this continues.

5 years down the road, he may say ‘hmm, i think, a girlfren must be one who is able to listen to all my worries, make me happy when i m sad, talk to me when i m bored, need not be confident, need not be ambitious nor have dreams, so as long as she is soft, demure and weak, that’s my girl. thats an ideal girlfren. someone who is always there for me.

then, another 2 years go down the road, and u asked him this grandmother question again.

this time, his reply was short, swift and ’sweet’. he most likely would say ‘a girlfren is an eternal companion. being together means companionship. partnership.

as u can see, there’s a time-resolved definition of an ideal girlfren. people constantly change their views on what’s hot and what’s not.

so, before u jump into any other possible, reasonably foreseeable relationships, always do an extrapolation to see from his previous experiences, to know how he feels, and do a market analysis to predict his next expectation of his girlfren. if u are unable to make the cut, then forget it. it is unlikely to work.

that’s my view of cos, and it is not always applicable cos i was brought up in a broken family  :)  well well.. why am i saying all these?

being attached, i really hope that my relationship would last and stretch till eternity. however, i have eversince realised the relative impossibility of having a relationship that stretches for so long. after some time, he realised that i am no longer the qianru he used to know.. he told me he missed waiting for me at the bus stop where i would alight, holding my favourite green hockey stick. he told me that he missed my stinky vjc pe tee shirt.

in the past, i used to be very sporty, taking up sports like judo and hockey. and i often swam. i had shoulder-length hair, was tanned, and did not look like who i am now. sluggy, artificial, and plain disgusting. althou after i changed, i also had more ppl saying that i am pretty, that’s beside the point.

right now, i haf deviated so much from who i was initially that i am at a loss whr do i start changing myself to mould myself back to who i was before. the girl who always wore tee shirts and jeans, had a short pony tail, makeup-less, smely with perspiration and more passionate about everything and anything. the girl whom ppl did not notice, not even a glance. the girl who always tried her best.